Baby news and memories
In light of the fact that our fourth child is due next week I have the following fun and sad memories:
Our first child died (miscarriage) and I remember weeping, holding a funeral and small burial in my dad’s garden. We called him Robert although we are uncertain if it was a boy. I don’t go by dreams but I woke up dreaming a little blonde boy walked towards me and said “daddy”. I said “Robert” hence the name. I woke up weeping and thinking of what God went through losing His only begotten son.
Our second child, (firstborn) was born in Job-erg.Glen Elias. I remember the midwife had just lost her best friend’s child at birth and was emotional about this. My wife’s water broke next to a lake and I exclaimed “Now I know where lakes come from”. I remember her face did not appreciate my discovery. Sue King (our first midwife) was wonderful. She had adopted a child and really was sweet. She never helped us again due to where we lived and also the fact she died of cancer leaving her adopted child to the mercy of others.
My dad was preaching at a conference at the time of Glen’s birth and the organizers actually said from the pulpit “He preached with unusual power as he came to the pulpit a dad and left a grandfather.”
Our third child, (second born) was Ruth Susanna Daniel. This was our first home birth. The funniest part which was actually hilarious was that the midwife came on the wrong morning. Basically, she thought that I was another patient ( also called Roy) who phoned her. I had decided I was going to sleep in just this one morning. 5AM she arrived hooting and tooting with the Doula and I was confused. She was rushing to find Jerusala when I shocked her by saying my wife was asleep. Believe it or not, it seems she was called by the other Roy and came to the wrong house. The water of the municipality was cut off for the area at birth. We went 4 days with no water (except bottles bought at shops) and then traveled home 4 hours and lo and behold there was no water at our home town as the government workers (part of a protest) had smashed up much of the town and also the water pipes. What I neglected to mention was that the midwife did not arrive at the actual birth. The doula said “ Don’t worry everything will be fine”, but then ran round the corner and I heard her saying to the midwife on a cellphone “ You come here right now … I can’t handle this … I can’t handle this!” She then ran back to my wife and said calmly “ Don’t worry everything will be fine, just don’t stress.” The baby was born without the midwife.
Our 4th child (third born) was little Clarissa. She was born in Cape Town as a home birth at my parents house and amazingly it was short and sweet. I do remember, however, that my mom as soon as she heard crying ( the baby had literally, just 2 seconds before, fallen out) while we were still trying just to lift baby up and help Jerusala on the bed, shouted from upstairs “Is it a boy or girl ?”. My dad was dead scared of holding the baby in case it broke, but I remember him melting when we forced him to take it.
A last little memory was when a family from USA visited. I remember them judging my neighbours openly and telling them they were pathetic parents. I did not agree and when they asked if they could visit again I basically wrote them an email saying “Yes, but only if you agree in advance not to hand out advice in a cruel way and not uplifting”
Unfortunately I used the language, “ Please do not give any more child bearing advice”. I had meant “child rearing” but this was a typo. I remember after sending the email, which was a bit tense due to the situation, laughing my head off not quite knowing what to do.
Now, we stand at the door of a fifth child (fourth to live hopefully). We know it is a girl. It is a little undersized and will not get into the right position. It is in an oblique lie. Our kind midwife does not want to take a chance and Jerusala has very fast births. If the baby is born in this position at home the cord would probably come out first and baby would die of lack of oxygen. She has advised us a few days before we should rather use the back up hospital. Please pray for us for the birth and also we are uncertain of two things. Firstly the costs of a hospital birth. They gave us a list of what all they may charge for and it is a long list. We will get some coverage, but are uncertain of every cost and it can easily be a lot.
Also, the last birth we had the government refused to give us a birth certificate and they called Jerusala a criminal. They said she never entered the country and that the baby had never been born. It seemed a lazy official at the airport had stamped her passport, but not got her in the country on their computer network. It took weeks to get her back in the country legally and get the baby born again. I don’t know how many of you have had a child born again at such a tender age and theologically it is a bit hard to explain.
This time as well, when walking through security I noticed their computers were down. We have phoned security at the airport several times to ask to check beforehand if my wife is in the country and they never ever answer. In other words, we again don’t know if she is in the country. If she is not it slows down the process of getting passports for South Africa and USA, birth certificate, etc. all of which are needed for me to travel overseas and preach ( and for a host of other practical things. Please pray for all this paperwork, pray for the birth of the child, pray for provision for costs, etc. ( not just birth, but driving 23 hours home, etc.) and also lastly pray for my wife’s Permanent Residence Visa which she still has not got 16 months after applying. This affects costs, ministry plans and much more so please pray. I also preach a seminar on Sunday and we are still figuring out if there are enough cars to get her to hospital if needed while I preach, but we will not take a chance and make appropriate arrangements.
If someone would like to help towards extra birth and related costs please go to to